The most important inheritance conversations are about trust, context, and relationships.

 

Emily Bouchard, TEDx speaker, founder of Family Focused Wealth, and host of the Wealth Coherence Podcast joins Tony on the Get Ready Before Life Happens podcast to talk about why families need safe, transparent conversations around money, trust, and inheritance.

 

They explore how trust, communication, and shared values help families build resilience, prepare beneficiaries, and reduce the emotional impact of inheritance and loss.

 

Key Takeaways

🔹 Inheritance conversations should focus on relationships before numbers.

🔹 Safe spaces allow families to share concerns, values, and expectations.

🔹 Trust is built through sincerity, reliability, competence, and care.

🔹 Beneficiaries need context and preparation, not just financial assets.

🔹 Lack of communication can increase inheritance trauma and confusion.

🔹 Understanding each other’s money stories strengthens family resilience.

🔹 Small, consistent conversations build trust and clarity over time.

 

🧠 Tony’s Take

Money changes family dynamics the moment it enters the room. Financial readiness means creating trust, context, and safe conversations before decisions are forced by life transitions.

 

 🎥 Watch this episode below: 

 

🎧 Listen to the podcast below or on your favorite podcast app. 

 

Connect with Emily Bouchard: 

 

• Website: https://emilybouchard.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/emily-bouchard-5a9a049/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/emily4families/

 

Books: 

 

• Beginners Guide to Purposeful Prenups: Three Essential Elements for a Successful Prenup Conversation by Emily Bouchard and Emily Chase Smith (Amazon)
• Estate Planning for the Blended Family by L. Paul Hood, Jr. and Emily Bouchard (Amazon)

 

Podcast: 

 

• Wealth Coherence Podcast: https://emilybouchard.com/podcasts/

 

Resources mentioned: 

 

• TEDx Talk: How to talk about inheritance (without talking about money) - (YouTube) 
• The Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable by Patrick Lencioni (Amazon)

 

Bio: 

 

Emily Bouchard is a coach and consultant to enterprising families and is dedicated to unlocking the full potential of individuals, couples and families, by guiding them through the complexities of wealth, relationships, and leadership. She is an author and speaker with over 20 years of experience coaching multigenerational families, with specializations in blended family dynamics and family business succession. As a fractional Chief Learning Officer, she designs personalized learning experiences that focus on lifelong growth, emotional intelligence, and financial acumen. She lives on 10-acres with 9 horses, where she facilitates transformative retreats.

 

👉 Start Your Financial Readiness Plan: A free, practical plan that helps you create your in-case-of-emergency Financial First Aid Kit, organize what matters, and prepare before life happens. Start Your Free Financial Readiness Plan  https://www.tonysteuer.com

 

👉 Support Get Ready. Become a Get Ready Insider and help keep the Financial Readiness Plan free, support the podcast, trusted resources, and consumer-first financial education. You’ll receive access to the Get Ready Library. Support Get Ready here. www.tonysteuer.com/support

Transcript 

This transcript has been lightly edited for clarity.

Tony: Most money challenges are really about trust, communication, and the questions families often don’t get around to asking.

Welcome to Get Ready: Before Life Happens.

I’m pleased to be joined today by Emily Bouchard.

Emily, welcome to the podcast.

Emily: Thanks so much. I’m delighted to be here.

Tony: I’m honored to have you on the show. You’ve got a great message, and I’m excited to jump into this.

Tell us a little bit about yourself. What is your origin story, and how did it lead you to focus on family dynamics?

Emily: If you want the full origin story, you can listen to my TEDx talk, How to Talk About Inheritance Without Talking About Money. I go into some detail there.

Basically, when my mother died very suddenly of a cerebral hemorrhage, nobody in my family knew how to talk about the issues that really mattered to us.

I was 14 at the time.

It was incredibly challenging, and I saw how deeply my family was affected.

We ended up becoming very distant from my mom’s family as a result, which was really sad.

That experience had a profound impact on me.

I became interested in child development and created a degree around it because my university didn’t offer that particular course of study.

I focused on what it’s like to be affected by illness as a teenager and then become a young adult.

I was really interested in what happens developmentally when a trauma occurs during adolescence.

I eventually became a child life specialist and worked in hospitals.

I saw the impact on the entire family system when a child was sick.

That led me to get a social work degree and specialize in marital and family therapy so I could help families navigate major challenges and become more resilient.

Then I became a stepmother to two teenagers.

I got to take everything I had studied and learned and apply it to my own family.

I had an extraordinary experience being a stepmom.

Then my 19-year-old stepdaughter had a baby, so I became a step-grandmother very early and learned even more in the trenches with my family.

Eventually, a colleague referred me to a consulting firm that worked with families who owned operating businesses.

These families were dealing with questions like:

How do we prepare the next generation for ownership of the family business?

If some family members aren’t working in the business, how do they interact with those who are?

If the business is sold, what happens with the money?

If there are conflicts around shared ownership, what do exit strategies look like?

These are emotionally charged issues where a lot is at stake.

Because of my background in youth development, education, and family dynamics, I became what they called a listening coach for the firm.

That was in 2004.

So I’ve been doing this for more than 20 years, which is kind of crazy to think about.

I didn’t know this field existed when I went to social work school.

Today these families might be described as ultra-high-net-worth families, but that terminology wasn’t really used when I started.

They were enterprising families that had accumulated significant financial resources.

My work became focused on helping families do well and become resilient.

And one thing I learned is that significant wealth can amplify whatever is already present in the family dynamics.

It can make things bigger and more challenging.

I also learned through research how vulnerable young people in these families can be.

People may think, “Poor little rich kids.”

But these young people often have access to enormous resources that aren’t necessarily good for them.

They can also miss some of the natural repercussions or consequences of behavior because money can rescue them.

Money can pay for great lawyers.

Influence can make problems disappear.

So they may not encounter some of those roadblocks when they’re younger.

That can set them up for very challenging lives later.

I became passionate about helping these families because the ripple effect can be enormous.

They have employees, communities, customers, and others who are affected by how the family functions.

There’s only one of me, so I’ve stayed largely focused on this population and helping these families build successful relationships.

Tony: There’s that old line: more money, more problems.

For everybody watching and listening, I’ll include a link to Emily’s TEDx talk in the show notes.

One thing you said is really important.

Everybody has issues.

It doesn’t matter who you are or what you think somebody else has achieved.

The issues may look different, but there are always family dynamics.

I want to go back to something you mentioned: listening coach.

I think listening is a superpower.

What exactly is a listening coach?

Emily: In that consulting firm, my role was to meet with every family member who was 16 or older.

That could include people who married into the family or were living with someone in the family.

The interviews could last anywhere from an hour to an hour and a half, sometimes three or four hours.

I can’t tell you how many founders I asked to block out three hours who said:

“This isn’t going to take more than 30 minutes.”

Then three hours later they’d say:

“Wait, can we keep going?”

Having a dedicated listener who also asks probing questions about the things that matter most to you is a real luxury.

My role was to learn as much as I possibly could about the family.

The dynamics.

The skeletons in the closet.

The things swept under the rug.

The what-ifs.

The patterns.

What happens if somebody brings up a particular topic?

What happens when there’s conflict?

Then when we brought the whole family together and taught skills around communication and trust, I could bring relevance to the conversation.

I wouldn’t make it about one particular person.

I might say:

“Families like yours often experience something like this.”

That normalizes it.

Nobody has to stick their neck out personally, but the concerns I know are in the room still get addressed.

That was my role.

Tony: I love that.

People think:

“This will only take half an hour.”

But when somebody genuinely listens and asks thoughtful questions, the conversation can completely change.

People may share far more than they expected.

Emily: I often liken it to being handed a beautiful gemstone, like the Hope Diamond.

I tell everyone:

“I want to hear life through your facet.”

“I want to see the world the way you see it.”

I presume I know nothing.

I don’t bring information from one interview into another.

I don’t tell people what somebody else told me.

I ask:

“How do you see the world?”

By the time I’m done, I can see the whole gem.

Each family member can only see the world through their own facet and how light refracts through the others.

But I can see the whole gemstone.

I can see where the imperfections are and where the beauty shines through.

Then I can help the family understand how to maximize the opportunity they have together.

Tony: I think that’s something every professional can learn from.

When I was consulting, I had to understand where the client was coming from rather than walking in with a predetermined solution.

As professionals, it’s very easy to say:

“I have the solution.”

But it may not be the solution the person is actually looking for.

That’s where trouble starts.

Emily: Definitely.

Tony: What do families miss when inheritance conversations focus only on money?

Emily: I often recommend making money the least important part of the conversation.

In a sense, you don’t even know how much money will be there when a transfer eventually happens, or exactly when it will happen.

Usually these resources become available or are used differently during a major transition.

Maybe a parent dies.

A grandparent dies.

There’s a liquidity event.

The most important thing is getting clear about the purpose of the family and the purpose of whatever resources you have.

It doesn’t have to be enormous wealth.

It can be as simple as a house.

You have three children.

You have one house.

You have a spouse from a second marriage living in the house.

What happens if ownership of the house ultimately goes to the three children while their stepmother is still living there?

Does she pay rent?

What does that arrangement look like?

So start with:

What is our relationship to one another?

What is the purpose of these resources?

What do we hope happens in each other’s lives because of them?

What are our concerns?

What are our worries?

A lot of people struggle with these conversations because of concerns about equality.

“If it isn’t equal, somebody will say it isn’t fair.”

“Somebody will be unhappy.”

But maybe one child has a special need, or has a child with special needs, and you want to create a trust for them.

Maybe another child is doing extremely well financially.

How do you structure things and talk about them so everybody understands your thought process?

They understand your hopes for them.

They understand why you’ve structured things the way you have.

That can make a huge difference in how people experience the plan after you’re gone.

Tony: I love that.

You have to provide context for your decisions.

That’s often missed in legacy planning.

People can have very good reasons for making the decisions they make, but they never tell anybody what those reasons are.

Then after they die, the children may be upset because what happened wasn’t what they expected.

Maybe the parent had a perfectly good reason.

But if they’re gone, nobody can ask.

Emily: Exactly.

Sometimes people don’t know what to expect at all.

Then the inheritance hits them almost like a meteor.

It can be surprising and jarring.

I think another mistake is that people spend a lot of time making decisions with their attorney, perhaps as a couple, without including the beneficiaries in the conversation.

You don’t necessarily have to talk about specific numbers.

But you can talk about the thinking behind the plan.

Maybe percentages.

Maybe the principles you’re using.

I’ll give you an example.

I do a lot of work with stepfamilies in addition to the ultra-high-net-worth work.

I’ve written for Stepmom Magazine and created resources for stepfamilies because bringing families together can be really complicated.

I worked with one couple where the husband wanted his four children treated equally.

Two were from a prior marriage and two were children they had together.

His wife wanted the two children they had together treated differently because his older children also had a mother whose estate they might inherit from.

Her perspective was:

“It’s only fair to treat them differently because our two children are only going to benefit from our estate.”

So this couple needed to find an approach that made sense given their different values, their histories, and why they each felt the way they did.

We worked together for about three months.

I use some archetypal work around money types.

We explored their values, histories, and money stories.

Eventually, they came up with a solution that was very unique and original.

Then I encouraged them to share it with all four adult children before they signed on the dotted line.

These children were going to be the beneficiaries of the plan.

Why not find out whether they had additional thoughts or perspectives?

The parents agreed.

I did some preliminary work with the adult children so everyone knew this would be a safe conversation.

Then the parents shared what they were thinking, how they arrived at the plan, and why.

The children were fantastic.

The two older children, who were closer in age to their stepmother, said they were really glad to know the plan.

They wanted their stepmother to live a long and healthy life.

They also realized they shouldn’t expect or count on receiving resources during their own lifetimes.

The money might ultimately be more relevant to their children.

That helped them realize they needed to focus on their own retirement planning and on education expenses for their kids.

Then something interesting happened.

The parents had never said anything about paying for the grandchildren’s education or making lifetime gifts.

When the children raised the topic, the parents said:

“We’d be happy to help with some of the grandchildren’s tuition. Education is something we really value.”

The financial advisors who had referred the family to me were blown away.

They had been talking with the couple about lifetime giving for years.

There were potential tax advantages and different planning strategies.

The parents had always said:

“No. We aren’t going to give money away while we’re alive.”

But through this family conversation, suddenly they said:

“Oh, we can do that.”

That possibility had never been on the table because of how they originally approached the issue.

They eventually created accounts for current and future grandchildren.

Then another important conversation happened.

One daughter was a physician.

She said:

“Dad, you’ve named me to make medical decisions for you, but I don’t know what your wishes are.”

“I can never talk to you about it because you get uncomfortable.”

“I just want to know that I’m doing what you want.”

Her father was uncomfortable talking about mortality, so he kept avoiding the conversation.

But because we had created a facilitated setting and done the preparation beforehand, they finally had an important conversation about end-of-life wishes.

They talked about health.

Wellness.

Memory loss.

What happens if someone is physically healthy but cognitively impaired?

They talked about resuscitation wishes.

That daughter and her parents were incredibly grateful because they had never been able to have that conversation before.

There is so much that can happen when you create a safe space where people can talk about the questions that are really burning in their minds.

Tony: There’s so much in that example.

One thing that really jumps out is:

If nobody knows your wishes, they can’t follow them.

You have to communicate what you want if you want people to act on it.

Otherwise, they’re taking their best guess.

And that guess may have nothing to do with what you actually wanted.

Emily: Exactly.

It can also become difficult when one family member says:

“I know what Dad wanted.”

And somebody else says:

“No, I talked to Dad, and that isn’t what he said.”

Then you have conflict.

If you have the conversation together, there’s transparency.

Everybody hears the same information.

And if you have a record of it, things become much easier during a crisis.

Tony: I went through something similar with my mom and my sister when my mom was sick.

We had different understandings.

That creates tension.

And it isn’t tension that necessarily disappears quickly.

Emily: No.

You’re talking about somebody’s life and well-being.

I’m sorry you went through that.

It’s incredibly common.

My father is 91.

My brother and I recently visited him.

My brother has power of attorney responsibilities, and he said:

“Dad, I really want to understand your wishes because I’m getting different messages.”

My father started talking about losing control of bodily functions.

We had to clarify:

“Dad, this isn’t about deciding your life has less value because your body is declining.”

“If you were unconscious and couldn’t make a decision, are you saying that if your body had deteriorated to a certain point, you wouldn’t want resuscitation or extraordinary measures?”

He said:

“Yes. That’s what I’m trying to say.”

We had to go back and forth because he was tracking two different ideas at once.

It was incredibly helpful for my brother and me to hear it together.

Then we could write down his wishes, share them with our other brother, and make sure his medical and legal documents accurately reflected what he meant.

Tony: That’s so important.

Have people there together.

Put the wishes in writing.

Then there’s less room for someone later to say:

“That isn’t really what Dad wanted.”

And I see that preparation as a gift to the family.

You’re taking some of that weight off their shoulders while also increasing the chances that your own wishes will actually be followed.

Emily: Exactly.

I’m actually finishing a book with Charles Feltman called The Little Book of Trust and Money: An Essential Primer for Families.

There’s an entire chapter devoted to transparency.

How do you build enough trust in the family to have these conversations and have them go well?

What happens when families aren’t transparent?

When they hold secrets?

When one person is told one thing and another person is told something different?

That can create enormous discord.

So we go into how to be sincere with one another and share what’s on your heart and mind around money.

Tony: That leads directly into trust.

Why is trust such an essential framework when families talk about money?

Emily: Because almost every financial decision involves some kind of trust.

I trust that if I make a transaction, I’m going to receive what I paid for.

Within a family, maybe I’m trusting you with a credit card.

I’m trusting you’ll use it the way we agreed.

Maybe I’m trusting you to repay something.

Families often don’t have conversations at that level of detail.

A parent may say:

“You can use this credit card for gas or emergencies.”

Then the statement arrives and there’s Netflix, Uber rides, Uber Eats, and other purchases.

Maybe the parent initially ignores those because they’re small.

But over time they add up.

Then you realize:

“We never established clear parameters.”

That becomes a trust conversation.

What is this card for?

When can you use it?

When should you use your own money?

If you use it because it’s convenient, when are you expected to reimburse us?

There needs to be accountability.

As children mature and become more trustworthy, you can give them more access to money and more opportunities to spend, save, and give.

You can be intentional about helping them build those skills.

In the book, we use a framework that looks at trust in four domains.

The first is sincerity.

That connects with transparency.

The second is reliability.

Does somebody consistently do what they say they’re going to do?

Can you depend on them?

Reliability is often the easiest area in which to repair trust because you can observe it.

You can measure it.

Did the person actually fulfill the promise?

Consistently doing that can help restore trust.

The third is competence.

Does somebody actually have the ability to do what they’re promising?

My 13-year-old granddaughter could sincerely tell me:

“I’ll take you to the airport.”

She may be completely sincere.

She may be reliable in lots of other areas.

But she doesn’t have a driver’s license.

She isn’t competent to drive me to the airport yet.

That doesn’t mean I don’t trust her as a person.

I simply don’t trust her to perform that particular task.

Competence becomes especially important in families.

Someone may be struggling with an addiction or another issue that affects their ability to make sound financial decisions.

That doesn’t mean you don’t love them.

It means it may not be in their best interest to have unrestricted access to certain financial resources.

Compare that with somebody who has shown over time that they understand money, make sound choices, and have the skills necessary to manage those resources.

Then the fourth domain is care.

Do we care about what the other person cares about?

How do we demonstrate that care?

Families have to be especially thoughtful here because care can sometimes become enabling or enmeshment.

“I care about this person, so I keep giving them money.”

But maybe they aren’t behaving responsibly.

Giving them more money may actually be harmful.

Sometimes care means setting boundaries or guardrails.

Looking at sincerity, reliability, competence, and care helps you understand where trust may have broken down and what you can do to rebuild it.

Tony: I really like that framework.

And as you said, you have to know where something has broken before you can repair it.

Competence is particularly interesting because we don’t always discuss that enough in legacy planning.

People may have very different capabilities.

One concept you’ve talked about is inheritance trauma.

What does that mean?

Emily: How much time do we have?

I think it’s important because someone may be completely in the dark about what they’re going to inherit.

Then suddenly the inheritance arrives, and they haven’t been prepared for it.

It has been compared to a meteoric event.

You know something may be coming.

You don’t know how big it will be.

You don’t know when it will hit.

But when it does, your life changes dramatically.

Typically, an inheritance also means you’ve lost somebody you love.

So you’ve gained something financially while experiencing grief.

There may also be rules and restrictions.

Maybe you now have to work with a trustee.

There’s a new financial language.

There’s jargon.

There are new responsibilities.

A helpful analogy is being a foreigner in a foreign land.

Imagine being raised in Paris but going only to English-speaking schools.

Everyone at home speaks English.

You’re never exposed to French.

Then when you turn 18, 21, or 25, you’re suddenly told:

“You need to be completely fluent in French and succeed in Paris.”

You’ve been placed at a huge disadvantage.

That can happen with inheritance.

Someone suddenly has to understand trusts, investments, taxes, governance, and all kinds of financial concepts they were never taught.

Then layer grief on top of it.

There may also be unresolved issues with the person who died.

Now the money becomes connected with those emotions.

You think:

“I need to be grateful for this money.”

“I need to be smart with it.”

“I don’t know how they wanted me to use it.”

Sometimes it goes in the other direction.

Maybe there are so many restrictions and expectations that the beneficiary feels controlled from the grave.

Both can happen.

A lack of transparent communication and preparation can create significant emotional repercussions.

Inheritance can also change relationships.

If somebody receives money or suddenly becomes connected with a prominent family name or different social status, people may treat them differently.

Friends may begin expecting them to pay for things.

As soon as money enters the relationship, power dynamics can change.

That can feel very isolating.

Having a community of people who have been through something similar can be incredibly helpful.

Tony: We often think:

“Wouldn’t it be great to inherit a pile of money?”

Obviously, there can be benefits.

But we don’t talk much about the downside or the adjustment.

You see similar things with lottery winners, professional athletes, or people who suddenly receive enormous resources.

Emily: Absolutely.

And it doesn’t have to involve enormous wealth.

I once met a woman on an airplane.

When she learned what I did, she told me she and her brother no longer spoke because of a vase.

Their parents had died.

There were so many unresolved issues surrounding the inheritance that the vase became a symbol of all of it.

There was one vase and two siblings.

They couldn’t agree on who should have it.

But the conflict wasn’t really about the vase.

It represented everything unresolved in their relationship and in how the estate had been handled.

Tony: I think that’s such an important point.

Family conflict doesn’t necessarily require millions of dollars.

Sometimes it really is a vase.

And even having the family conversation doesn’t guarantee everything will be resolved.

But at least you’ve made an effort to address it before the crisis.

Emily: Exactly.

We say:

“Families need to talk about these things.”

But if people don’t know how to have the conversation, they may avoid it because they’re afraid it will devolve into conflict.

Or they have the conversation, conflict erupts, and everyone pulls apart.

People need skills for navigating conflict.

One book I often recommend is Patrick Lencioni’s The Five Dysfunctions of a Team.

It’s written for business teams, but there’s a lot families can learn from it.

He uses the phrase artificial harmony.

Families often operate with artificial harmony.

Everybody gets along by avoiding certain topics.

At Thanksgiving, everyone knows what they’re allowed to discuss and what they aren’t.

Then after a couple glasses of wine, something comes out.

There are other ways to do it.

Families can have genuine harmony that still allows disagreement.

Everybody’s voice can be heard.

Learning to navigate difficult conversations successfully is an enormously valuable life skill.

Tony: Do you have any quick tips for people who want to start having these conversations?

Emily: I wrote a small book called The Beginner’s Guide to Purposeful Prenups.

It’s designed to help couples have difficult conversations before getting married in ways that strengthen the marriage.

But the principles can be used by siblings or across generations too.

Start by connecting around shared values.

What are your values?

Where did they come from?

Then share your money stories.

What memories shaped your relationship with money?

What strengthens your relationship with money?

What gets in the way?

Create a safe place to talk about vulnerability, mistakes, and transgressions without judging each other.

We are all human.

We all make mistakes with money.

There’s research around how children experiment with ownership and money as they develop, including taking something that isn’t theirs.

What matters is how those experiences are handled and what the child learns from them.

I was once on a podcast where the host said:

“Oh my gosh. I’ve never told my husband about a time when I took money as a child.”

I said:

“Maybe that would be an interesting story to share with him.”

“Maybe he has one too.”

It was liberating for her to realize:

“I’m not the only person who did something I shouldn’t have.”

When you understand one another’s experiences with money, what happened, how it was handled, and what you learned, you begin to understand each other much more deeply.

That creates a foundation you can return to when things become difficult.

You can ask:

“For the sake of what are we having this conversation?”

“Because I care about you.”

“Because I want us to find a solution that works.”

Then the conversation becomes less about:

“You said this.”

“No, you said that.”

And more about:

“Let’s look at this together.”

“We’re on the same side.”

How do we want to work together to create an effective resolution for everyone?

Tony: That’s almost a drop-the-mic moment right there:

How do we want to work together?

That question alone can change the perspective.

And I love the values and money-story piece because it gets us back to where we started.

We aren’t really talking only about money.

Money is part of the conversation, but there’s so much happening underneath it.

Emily, to wrap up, I have what’s called the Get Ready Hot Take Trio.

These are three quick questions I ask all my guests.

First:

What’s one money myth you’re trying to break?

Emily: The belief that money is the root of all evil.

That’s an incorrectly quoted statement.

The idea is about the love of money or greed, rather than money itself.

Money is simply a medium that makes it easier for us to transact with one another.

Otherwise, I might have to bring you a bushel of pumpkins in exchange for the candlesticks you made.

Money makes exchange easier.

We’ve layered all kinds of meaning onto it.

Tony: Exactly.

Human beings have used all kinds of mediums of exchange throughout history.

Money itself is simply a tool for exchange.

Let’s get out the time machine for a minute.

If you could go back knowing what you know now about money, what advice would you give your younger self?

Emily: I would tell myself to understand the power of compound interest and start saving earlier.

If I had started saving a little bit every week, every month, every year and simply continued doing it, that small amount could have compounded significantly over time.

It’s extraordinary to see what a simple, small act repeated consistently can become.

Tony: Compound interest is definitely one of the most common answers I hear.

But I really love the way you said that:

What a simple, small act repeated over time can do.

That extends beyond money.

Small acts of gratitude.

Friendliness.

Kindness.

All of those things can compound too.

Emily: Absolutely.

Kindness.

Tony: Final question.

What’s your number one tip to change the way we think about money?

Emily: Shine a light on the places where you feel the most shame or where there are unresolved issues around money.

When we keep those things in the dark, we can start believing:

“I’m the only person who has done this.”

“This is unforgivable.”

Maybe there’s regret about a financial decision.

Maybe you were scammed.

Maybe something else happened.

Whatever it is, see if you can bring self-compassion, self-forgiveness, and healing to it.

Ask:

“What can I learn from this?”

When we keep something hidden in a shameful place, it takes on a life of its own.

It can keep us from moving differently.

We may think:

“If I keep berating myself for this mistake, that will keep me from making it again.”

Maybe.

But it can also sabotage our ability to move forward successfully.

And I’d go back to incremental action too.

If something big is happening in your financial life, whether it’s debt, taxes, paying for college, or something else, start now.

Start small.

Build slowly over time.

Make it a small regular action so it becomes doable.

Tony: Exactly.

Think of a snowball.

Start small and let it build.

Emily, where can people learn more about you, your work, and your podcast, Wealth Coherence?

Emily: Wealth Coherence is available on YouTube, Apple, Spotify, and wherever you listen to podcasts.

The show focuses on the true meaning of wealth, which I see as well-being.

I focus on the nonfinancial aspects of wealth:

Health.

Emotional well-being.

Leadership.

The other dimensions of life that contribute to a truly rich life.

People can find me at EmilyBouchard.com.

I’m also very active on LinkedIn, where I have a newsletter and post regularly.

Tony: Fantastic.

For everybody watching and listening, there will be links in the show notes.

Emily, thanks for joining us on Get Ready: Before Life Happens.

Emily: Thanks so much, Tony. It was a total delight.

Tony: This was a lot of fun.

And thank you, everyone, as always, for tuning in to this episode of Get Ready: Before Life Happens.

If you learned something today that changed the way you think about money, please subscribe and share this episode with a friend.

You can also join the Get Ready Movement at TonySteuer.com to receive my newsletter and access free resources.

Because when life happens, the way you think about money matters.